you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I will be naked everywhere
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
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