were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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