It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
