Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
