As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
