i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
