Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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