so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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