I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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