woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
