i don't like sucking hair
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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