we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I need moral support for this bender
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
