omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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