well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
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