Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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