Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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