babies were throwing up all over the place
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
