Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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