I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
