why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
