He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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