i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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