Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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