R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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