I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize