Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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