it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
