YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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