you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
