Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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