Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
