so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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