First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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