Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Randomize