he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
