I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
