You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
its liver damage thursday
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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