im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
He called his prostate his "boner button".
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize