I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
the day after is always just damage control
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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