um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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