Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
