So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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