I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
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