You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
