I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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