This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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