sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
