why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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