He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
