and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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